آهنگ: Soundtrack Artists. Hooray For Hapgood.

GROUP A:
Hooray for A, the group that's well-adjusted,
Everyone can be trusted
In Group A!

GROUP ONE:
Have fun with One, the group that's not neurotic.
Everyone's patriotic
In Group One!

BOTH GROUPS:
Dignity, integrity and so on,
We haven't much to go on,
Still we go on.
We've a platform strong enough to grow on:

GROUP A:
Whenever they cheer, we're incensed!


GROUP ONE:
Whenever they're for, we're against!

GROUP A:
Hooray for Hapgood,
Hapgood can be trusted,
Friend of the well-adjusted
In Group A!...

NARRATOR:
Hapgood appears, carried aloft in Cora's litter, and they follow him out of the square, leaving it deserted - except for a dazzling redhead in dark glasses.

FAY:
Bonjour.