آهنگ: Laptop. The New You.

Your life is going nowhere fast
You never stand out
(just a face in the crowd)
And you have to if you want success
(and I know that you want success, doesn't everybody want success)

You need a gimmick
You need a shtick
You need to change something
You need to re-invent it
Change your name
Lift your face
Change your everything

I like it

I much prefer the new you
So much better than the old you
The new you
So much better than the old you

People are finally going to notice you
Hey, who is that man?
(I like what he's doing)
Let's give him lots of money
(send him a check, sign him up)

What a gimmick!
What a shtick!
The kids will love that!
The kids will imitate it!
They'll change their names
They'll lose some weight
Spread make up on their faces

They'll like it

They'll much prefer the new you
They'll much prefer the new you
The new you
So much better than the old you

Three cheers for the modern you
Hip hip hooray! Hip hip hooray!
Three cheers for the modern you
Hip hip hooray! Hip hip hooray!
Three cheers for the modern you
Hip hip hooray! Hip hip hooray!

I like it

I much prefer the new you
I much prefer the new you
I much prefer the new you
I much prefer...